my drunk step mom just informed me my dad likes reverse cowgirl. Please god kill me.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize