Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
My balls are so social today.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
You know how it is. Tell me not to do somebody and suddenly I wanna.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
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