What did we do last night that was yellow?
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
the girls im babysitting are trying to see how much jello they can swallow without chewing...their future boyfriends are lucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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