So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I think that living in the "now" is the worst fucking ghandi buddha whatever advice bc that means I'm just gonna get drunk in the now.
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