he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I elbow dropped a bag of ice to break it so we could make margaritas. I bled everywhere. Be proud.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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