Listen the way I know if I'm drunk is if I have stage fright in the pisser if I do then I'm not drunk! And I definitely still do right now!
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Randomize