scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
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