i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Next time i try to unbutton my R.A's shirt with my teeth, please stop me
No promises.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
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