she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
Randomize