I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
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