Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I think your dad took our porno
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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