im drinking this country out of the recession.
How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
first time Ive ever had to stop sex to go pass out in the kitchen floor...
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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