You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Abreva sucks. I applied it as directed and now it looks like I fed the herpes. They're throwing a party on my bottom lip.
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Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
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I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
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