I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
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