this will be a night to untag.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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