Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
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