Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
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This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
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They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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