so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
i will never coherently bang her
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Like, what's the customary waiting period to hookup with your newly single ex that you never stopped hooking up with?
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
I lost my wolf penis dildo in my garage. I should probably find it before I resume my garage sale tomorrow...
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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