You work out of a Hotel?
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
No more Irish car bombs ever.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
It's not christmas until we're acting sober in front of grandma
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