How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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