Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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