i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
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so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
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That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
he left a full can of coors light underneath my windshield wiper, like a love note. if that's not husband material, i don't know what is
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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