I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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