I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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