we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Randomize