I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You don't want any of I have. Seriously. Its 80 proof rum that was 8 bucks for a liter. I'm afraid
I'm sure your liver is writing out a will as we speak
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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