Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
All I know is you walked out of the kitchen in some kind of French onion dip bra and started passing out individual chips to guys saying " do you dip?"
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize