Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
HAVE BEEN SPEAKING IN RUSSIAN ACCENT FOR 5 HOURS
SHIRT GONE
Randomize