i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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