If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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