No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
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