the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
I HAVE MY OWN TITS FOR THAT AND I CAN GUARANTEE THAT THEYRE MORE GLORIOUS
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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