Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just masturbated to a Jock Jams cd. What have you done today?
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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