I hate your face
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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