if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Too much gin, very little bucket
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
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