we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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