Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
He wanted to bang in the work van while we were on shift together. He convinced me with "It's like the Scooby Doo van but looks nothing like the Scooby Doo van."
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
Randomize