I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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