...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
My synapses wont fire in a pattern that will process those facts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize