He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
Like, what do you do with girlfriends? Buy her dinner and just like leave?
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Randomize