just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I'm pretty sure I said "this might be the last time I'm in here" but then I took his pants off so that's a mixed message
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I'm literally in my bed still trying to find the energy to take my corset off so I can binge eat oreos
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
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