Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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