wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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