things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
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Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
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It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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