I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
i just used google streetview to figure out where i spent the night last night
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like captain Morgan put his peg leg up my ass
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize