We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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