someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize