Can i not drive my cunt home
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
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