What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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