The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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